Bullying
BULLYING
Bullying is very common it isn't limited to age, sex, culture, or religious background. Bullying is a lot more common than a lot of people think and can happen at school, work, home or on the sporting field. It can be done verbally, by writing, texting or on line by email or chat room.
Bullying usually starts because of some perceived difference.
The difference can be related to culture, sex, sexuality, physical or mental ability or disability, religion, body size and physical appearance, age, cultural or economic background or being new to a school, work place, to a country, to a social group, or being new to a sports team.
WHO ARE BULLIES?
A bully can be someone on their own or a group of people. It can be someone who doesn't know you very well or can be your girl friend, boyfriend, sister, brother, member of your family, a teacher, your boss or someone in authority.
WHY THEY BULLY
Bullies are often trying to make themselves feel more powerful, since they have often been bullied themselves, or have experienced violence or some situation that makes there feel venerable. They often have low self esteem and are trying to make themselves feel better by making others feel bad. Bullies often are motivated by jealousy, misunderstanding or lack of knowledge.
DIFFERENCE TYPES OF BULLYING
There are a number of ways a person can be bullied:
- Verbally: Teasing, name calling or put downs, threats, sexual harassment, or even innuendo, hinting that something might happen.
- Written form: This may be by letter, sms, email.
- Physical: Being tripped, kicked, punched or having your things stolen or damaged. It might also include sexual abuse.
- Social: Being left out, ignored or having rumors spread about you.
- Psychological: Giving dirty looks, talking about you to others, being stalked or making you feel intimidated or manipulated.
BEING BULLIED IS NOT YOUR FAULT
Being bullied is not acceptable and it is not your fault. Don't be afraid to let someone know that you are being bullied as they may be able to help you. In the workplace or if it continues it is also illegal. Most schools look at bullying as very serious and if teachers know about it will do something about it straight away.
HOW BULLYING MAKES YOU FEEL
Being bullied can make you feel lots of different emotions including:
- If its been happening for a while, you may think you are to blame, feel guilty for wanting the bullying to stop and feel like you deserve to be bullied.
- Feeling like you are stuck or that the situation is hopeless.
- Because bullying can be part of the culture or everyday way of doing things in some places such as school, work, social groups, sporting groups etc. It can sometimes feel like "the world" is against you. It can feel like there is no particular person or group that you can target to try to resolve the issues and stop the bullying.
- You feel like you aren't accepted by the "cool" people or don't fit in.
- You may feel like changing the way you look or hurting yourself - some people become anorexic or bulimic because it's the only way they feel they can cope with the bad feelings that come from being bullied.
- If you are bullied for being good at something- school work, sport, music, art, work, or in your hobbies - you may feel like giving up, hiding your talents because you want to stop others being jealous or hostile (some call it the "tall poppy syndrome").
- You may feel rejected or depressed.
- You may feel like you have to put yourself down in front of others to get accepted.
- You may feel like you have to become the "class clown" so that people laugh at you rather than hate you.
- Alienated at school - no one to turn to as sometimes even teachers don't understand. Sometimes teachers bully too. Sometimes teachers feel threatened by students who question and challenge decisions, who think differently or who know more than they do.
- You may feel like the names people call you are true and start to believe you are worthy of being put-down.
- You may feel that people look at you on the surface and don't see the real you- for example, if you are in a wheel-chair they may only see the fact that you don't walk, and riot that you have a good sense of humor or have strong interests in sport.
- You may feel unsafe or afraid.
- You may feel confused and stressed.
- You may feel ashamed of yourself, family, gender, race or culture, or economic position.
For more information follow these links:
Reachout.com.au
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